Basketball Jokes
And Funny
Humor
LEARN HOW TO GROW TALLER FASTER!
#1 JUMP HIGHER PROGRAM!
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No, but they gave one to me anyway. - L.A. Lakers rookie Elden Campbell whenasked if he earned a degree at Clemson University
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How many NCAA basketball players does it take to change a light bulb?Only one. But he gets money, a car, and three credit hours for it.
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Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?Because it heard the referee was blowing fouls.
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A true Bobby Knight story recalled as best as can be remembered from the"Morning Briefing" section of the L.A. Times:In the '80 Olympics, the U.S. basketball team, coached by Bobby Knight, playedand beat the Chinese team handily. When asked about the win, Bobby said, "It wasalot of fun playing the Chinese, but an hour later, we wanted to play themagain."
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I once read a magazine bio of a down-and-out basketball star who was sodesperately addicted that he took to crime. Let's call him "Joe" for dramaticeffect. His first mistake was to rob a convenience store in his own neighborhood.The owner of the store instantly recognized the six-foot-plus basketball starneighbor despite his pathetic attempt to wear a mask. When the owner said,"Joe, don't do this, okay?" To which the player/robber replied, "Naw, it ain't me, man. It ain't me."Lysine requirement of sows nursing large litters. A cooperative study.
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-You’re asked in a spelling bee contest to spell Krzyzewsky, Gheorghe, Gugliotta, Marciulionis, Jacikevicius, Ilgauskas and Szczerbiak… and you spell each and every name perfectly right. What's more, you spell Tomjanovich with an 'h' and Rakocevic without one...
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-You honestly believe Bill Bradley has just about a 50:50 fair chance to become the next President of the United States, with George Bush trailing a distant second with just a 26% chance....
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-You are outraged with so many 'phony' basketball fans who start leaving the game full three minutes before the final whistle...
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particularly as you yourself have the odd habit of arriving a full hour before start of any game and refusing to quite the stands till the last second when they start switching off the lights...
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-You think Shaq raps better than Dr. Dre and LL Cool J and acts better than Jack Nicholson and Denzel Washington...
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and it's celebration time in your home every game Shaquille's free throw percentage rate jumps to double figures...
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-You paint your room orange with just some abrupt lines of black here and there
